14 July 2001 - invaders beware

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Foreign invaders beware! For the first time since the Cold War, the United States military has been given, as one of its missions, the defense of the United States. That means you, Saddam Hussein, and you, Kim Jong Il! Your invasion fleets will be diverted to Vieques Island and handcuffed to protesters.

the Daily Whale || copyright 2001, 2014 Jay J.P. Scott <jay@satirist.org>