19 September 1999 - disaster advice

Dear Advice Columnist,

I read that Turkey and Greece are getting to be almost friendly now that they’ve had his-and-hers matching earthquakes. Can major natural disasters be a force for good as well as evil?
— Silver Lining

Lining, unless you own stock in an insurance company, natural disasters have virtually no ill effects. When they smite your enemies, you have your choice of ways to gloat—for example, by helping out. When they hurt your friends, you can look heroic by dispatching rescue teams and expired medicines. When they hit you there’s a spot of inconvenience, but your insurance will pay for it in the end, plus if you lose your teddy bear you might get on national television. So don’t worry. Throw together flimsy houses on hurricane-prone shores like the Americans, or ignore the building codes altogether like the ingenious Turks. You won’t regret it!
— Advice W. Columnist