8 October 2002 - working ports 2

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The port labor dispute harms everybody else more than it harms the disputants. It’s the kind of situation that calls plaintively for a bold, sweeping, Reaganesque, B-movie solution. What should President Shrub do?

A. Nationalize the ports in the name of national security, kick out the current mismanagers and install official government mismanagers.
B. Declare the longshoremen “enemy combatants” and imprison them without trial until they voluntarily go back to work.
C. Renounce this free trade nonsense and create a new, self-reliant, self-sufficient America. First step: Replace energy imports by rendering down the fat of the government budget into oil.

the Daily Whale || copyright 2002, 2014 Jay J.P. Scott <jay@satirist.org>