< yesterday -- tomorrow >
It doesn’t matter how much you advise or don’t advise your friends.
If they’re stupid, they’ll mess up no matter what you say,
and if they’re smart, they’ll know better than to defer to some loser
who needs help from an advice columnist.
But this business of not listening to yourself, that’s serious.
It could lead to undesirable behavior, like voting for Jesse Ventura.
You should join the Army to get used to following arbitrary instructions.
Armed with only a gun, you’ll be less dangerous to others.
— Advice W. Columnist
the Daily Whale copyright 1999, 2014 Jay J.P. Scott <firstname.lastname@example.org>